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Monday, March 24, 2003

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Posted Monday, March 24, 2003 at 3/24/2003 02:52:00 PM
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Warmonger Explains War With Iraq To Peacenik
Author Unknown
3-18-3

Peacenik: Why did you say we are invading Iraq?
Warmonger: We are invading Iraq because it is in violation of security council resolution 1441. A country cannot be allowed to violate security council resolutions.
PN: But I thought many of our allies, including Israel, were in violation of more security council resolutions than Iraq.
WM: It's not just about UN resolutions. The main point is that Iraq could have weapons of mass destruction, and the first sign of a smoking gun could well be a mushroom cloud over NY.
PN: Mushroom cloud? But I thought the weapons inspectors said Iraq had no nuclear weapons.
WM: Yes, but biological and chemical weapons are the issue.
PN: But I thought Iraq did not have any long range missiles for attacking us or our allies with such weapons.
WM: The risk is not Iraq directly attacking us, but rather terrorists networks that Iraq could sell the weapons to.
PN: But couldn't virtually any country sell chemical or biological materials? We sold quite a bit to Iraq in the eighties ourselves, didn't we?
WM: That's ancient history. Look, Saddam Hussein is an evil man that has an undeniable track record of repressing his own people since the early eighties. He gasses his enemies. Everyone agrees that he is a power-hungry lunatic murderer.
PN: We sold chemical and biological materials to a power-hungry lunatic murderer?
WM: The issue is not what we sold, but rather what Saddam did. He is the one that launched a pre-emptive first strike on Kuwait.
PN: A pre-emptive first strike does sound bad. But didn't our ambassador to Iraq, April Glaspie, know about and green-light the invasion of Kuwait?
WM: Let's deal with the present, shall we? As of today, Iraq could sell its biological and chemical weapons to Al Qaida. Osama BinLaden himself released an audio tape calling on Iraqis to suicide attack us, proving a partnership between the two.
PN: Osama Bin Laden? Wasn't the point of invading Afghanistan to kill him?
WM: Actually, it's not 100% certain that it's really Osama Bin Laden on the tapes. But the lesson from the tape is the same: there could easily be a partnership between Al Qaeda and Saddam Hussein unless we act.
PN: Is this the same audio tape where Osama Bin Laden labels Saddam a secular infidel?
WM: You're missing the point by just focusing on the tape. Powell presented a strong case against Iraq.
PN: He did?
WM: Yes, he showed satellite pictures of an Al Qaeda poison factory in Iraq.
PN: But didn't that turn out to be a harmless shack in the part of Iraq controlled by the Kurdish opposition?
WM: And a British intelligence report...
PN: Didn't that turn out to be copied from an out-of-date graduate student paper?
WM: And reports of mobile weapons labs...
PN: Weren't those just artistic renderings?
WM: And reports of Iraqis scuttling and hiding evidence from inspectors...
PN: Wasn't that evidence contradicted by the chief weapons inspector, Hans Blix?
WM: Yes, but there is plenty of other hard evidence that cannot be revealed because it would compromise our security.
PN: So there is no publicly available evidence of weapons of mass destruction in Iraq?
WM: The inspectors are not detectives, it's not their JOB to find evidence. You're missing the point.
PN: So what is the point?
WM: The main point is that we are invading Iraq because resolution 1441 threatened "severe consequences." If we do not act, the security council will become an irrelevant debating society.
PN: So the main point is to uphold the rulings of the security council?
WM: Absolutely. ... unless it rules against us.
PN: And what if it does rule against us?
WM: In that case, we must lead a coalition of the willing to invade Iraq.
PN: Coalition of the willing? Who's that?
WM: Britain, Turkey, Bulgaria, Spain, and Italy, for starters.
PN: I thought Turkey refused to help us unless we gave them tens of billions of dollars.
WM: Nevertheless, they may now be willing.
PN: I thought public opinion in all those countries was against war.
WM: Current public opinion is irrelevant. The majority expresses its will by electing leaders to make decisions.
PN: So it's the decisions of leaders elected by the majority that is important?
WM: Yes.
PN: But George B-
WM: I mean, we must support the decisions of our leaders, however they were elected, because they are acting in our best interest. This is about being a patriot. That's the bottom line.
PN: So if we do not support the decisions of the president, we are not patriotic?
WM: I never said that.
PN: So what are you saying? Why are we invading Iraq?
WM: As I said, because there is a chance that they have weapons of mass destruction that threaten us and our allies.
PN: But the inspectors have not been able to find any such weapons.
WM: Iraq is obviously hiding them.
PN: You know this? How?
WM: Because we know they had the weapons ten years ago, and they are still unaccounted for.
PN: The weapons we sold them, you mean?
WM: Precisely.
PN: But I thought those biological and chemical weapons would degrade to an unusable state over ten years.
WM: But there is a chance that some have not degraded.
PN: So as long as there is even a small chance that such weapons exist, we must invade?
WM: Exactly.
PN: But North Korea actually has large amounts of usable chemical, biological, AND nuclear weapons, AND long range missiles that can reach the west coast AND it has expelled nuclear weapons inspectors, AND threatened to turn America into a sea of fire.
WM: That's a diplomatic issue.
PN: So why are we invading Iraq instead of using diplomacy?
WM: Aren't you listening? We are invading Iraq because we cannot allow the inspections to drag on indefinitely. Iraq has been delaying, deceiving, and denying for over ten years, and inspections cost us tens of millions.
PN: But I thought war would cost us tens of billions.
WM: Yes, but this is not about money. This is about security.
PN: But wouldn't a pre-emptive war against Iraq ignite radical Muslim sentiments against us, and decrease our security?
WM: Possibly, but we must not allow the terrorists to change the way we live. Once we do that, the terrorists have already won.
PN: So what is the purpose of the Department of Homeland Security, color-coded terror alerts, and the Patriot Act? Don't these change the way we live?
WM: I thought you had questions about Iraq.
PN: I do. Why are we invading Iraq?
WM: For the last time, we are invading Iraq because the world has called on Saddam Hussein to disarm, and he has failed to do so. He must now face the consequences.
PN: So, likewise, if the world called on us to do something, such as find a peaceful solution, we would have an obligation to listen?
WM: By "world", I meant the United Nations.
PN: So, we have an obligation to listen to the United Nations?
WM: By "United Nations" I meant the Security Council.
PN: So, we have an obligation to listen to the Security Council?
WM: I meant the majority of the Security Council.
PN: So, we have an obligation to listen to the majority of the Security Council?
WM: Well... there could be an unreasonable veto.
PN: In which case?
WM: In which case, we have an obligation to ignore the veto.
PN: And if the majority of the Security Council does not support us at all?
WM: Then we have an obligation to ignore the Security Council.
PN: That makes no sense.
WM: If you love Iraq so much, you should move there. Or maybe France, with the all the other cheese-eating surrender monkeys. It's time to boycott their wine and cheese, no doubt about that.
PN: I give up.

at 3/24/2003 09:17:00 AM
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Christopher Butcher: Is 29 years old and lives in Toronto Canada. In addition to the manager of world-famous comic book store The Beguiling, he is a freelance writer and comics production artist and the co-founder of the Toronto Comic Arts Festival. He can be contacted at chris at beguiling dot com , though chances are it will get caught in the spam filter. You're better off posting in the comments field.

Comics Blogs I Read & Like:
Bags & Boards: Tom McLean's media-focused comics blog.
The Beat: Heidi MacDonald, dishing and digging up dirt (now at PW).
Beaucoup Kevin: Kevin talks about all of the comic books.
Big Sexy Arune: Comic journalist Arune Singh's blog.
Brill Building: Ian Brill's blog.
The Comics Reporter: Tom Spurgeon's all-in-one website featuring newsblogging, interviews, reviews, and more. A great site.
Comics Worth Reading: Johanna Draper-Carlson reviews and recaps with a unique eye for comics.
Completely Futile: Excellent commentary on manga.
The Cultural Gutter: Toronto blog about video games, comics, and all manner of low-culture.
Drawn.ca: Lots of Canadian Illustrators and artists linkblogging the best art of the internet. Neat.
Egon: Grand-daddy of art-comix coverage.
Forbidden Planet Blog: Brit Comic Retailer Forbidden Planet.
Galleycat: About publishing, including comics.
Gumpop: Sophie Yanow runs a very cool blog about comics, that I enjoy reading.
Jog The Blog: Like the similarly singley-named Cher, Jog contributes something precious and unique to the world.
Johnny Bacardi: Comics coverage, and the promise of alcohol.
Journalista!: Dirk Deppey sacrifices martyrs his social life for comics. Bless.
Kelly Sue's Pro Blog: Kelly ends up re-writing manga I love. Also, she has a personal blog.
Kochalkaholic: Alan David Doane's living tribute to cartoonist James Kochalka.
Love Manga: Exceptionally thorough manga blog.
The Low Road: My buddies Ed and John talk about comics and stuff.
Manga Blog: Accurately named! Considered manga commentary.
MangaCast: More manga than you can shake a stick at.
Mystifying Oracle: Jeff Parker's very cool blog.
NeilAlien Has been blogging longer than I have.
Blog @ Newsarama Graeme and Kevin Melrose live here now.
Panels and Pixels: Dude, it's comics and video games all in one. I find this excellent.
Peiratikos: Rose and Steven's unique, contrary views on comics.
Polite Dissent: Unique comics criticism and examination, through the eyes of an MD.
Precocious Curmedgeon: Manga, North American Comics, and the industry. A fabulous read.
Postmodern Barney: Dorian blogs about comics, homosexuals.
Progressive Ruin: Mike Sterling's chronicle of funny superhero nonsense and working in a comic store.
Read About Comics: Greg McElhatton's new reviews website.
Riot! Blog: Blog for a new indy-friendly comic book store.
Rocketship Comics: Blog for an indy-friendly Brooklyn-based comic book store.
Royal Academy of Illustration and Design Blog: A fabulously talented studio of comics and illustration peeps.
Savage Critics: From sunny California...
Splash Panel: Comics reviews and discussion from a talented artist.
Sporadic Sequential: Huzzah! It's John Jakala blogging again!
When Will the Hurting Stop: Tim O'Neil, man of action.
When Fangirls Attack: A big 'ole round-up of women's issues as they relate to comics.
Yet Another Comics Blog: Even with its strange preoccupation with superhero books, I still find myself enjoying this one.

Comic Weblog Update
PubSub - The Comics List

Comics Publishers Blogs:
Drawn & Quarterly Blog: Oh, Canada! You publish great comics!
FLOG! Fantagraphics Blog: Company blog from Fantagraphics.
First Second Books: Featuring tons of editor and creator blog posts.
Oni Press Buzz: Oni Press' company blog.
Prism Comics: All things gay and comic related.
Top Shelf: Hey, Bartender! The Top Shelf company blog.
Tulip Tree Press: Hope Larson's new publishing company.

Comics Artists and Friends:
Radiomaru: Bryan Lee O'Malley, creator of Scott Pilgrim and etc.
HopeLarson.com: Hope Larson, creator of Salamander Dream and Gray Horses.
KeanerDotNet: Kean Soo, creator of Jellaby.
The Rey: Corey Lewis, creator of Sharknife and etc.
Gobukan: J. Bone's G-Rated Illustration Blog.
Bone's Men: J. Bone's much naughtier Illustration Blog.
Vera's Sketchblog: My friend Vera's awesome sketch blog.
Salgood Sam: Sketch blog and work diary.
Ink Skratch: Eric Kim, artist of Love as a Foreign Language.
lowbright.com: Derek Kirk Kim's site, with lots of great comics.
Bolt City: Kazu Kibuishi, creator of Copper and Amulet.
NeilComics.com: Neil B.'s site, with lots of great comics.
Matt Forsythe, words and pictures.
Mike Weiringo's Sketch Blog: Self-explaintory.
FSC Wasteland: Singapore cartoonist FSC, artist on all kinds of things I like.
Local: Frequently-updated blog for Oni Press' LOCAL.
StreetAngelComics: Jim Rugg's web presence, dedicated to his first great comic.
Atomic Toy: The online home of Andy Helms, soon the be known for his awesome graphic novel FEARLESS GRIGGS.

Online Comics:
Young Bottoms in Love: Great gay webcomix archive.
Achewood: My favourite webcomic.
Penny Arcade: Thrice-weekly comic strip about video game culture.
Diesel Sweeties: Pixel-based hipster soap opera, with death robots.
Dinosaur Comics! OMGWTF! In a just world, Ryan North would rule us all.
Comic Strip: Chip Zdarsky's print/online comic for the National Post.
Secret Friend Society: Online comics including Jellaby, Salamander Dream, and more!
A Softer World Comics made of photos. Also, check out OverQualified by the same author, which are humourously deranged cover letters for resumes.
House of Sugar: Rebecca Kraatz' daily online comic strip.
Makeshift Miracle Complete online graphic novel, available via Bitpass.
Moresukine Updated weekly from Tokyo, experience Japan through the wonder of comics.
Perry Bible Fellowship Very funny short comic strips, very well drawn too. Click on the man with the hat to get to the archives.
Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles Awesome/creepy weekly comic strip.
Superslackers Toronto's Steve Manale presents humourous superheroes for children of all ages. The tonic to 'Infinite Crisis'.
ButternutSquash Ramon and Rob do an autobiographical comic that people think is farace. It is not. They're just like that.
Jay's Days You will not be able to tear yourself away.
Serializer.net: Awesome online alternative pay-comics site, worth your support with money.
ModernTales.com: The original, filled to the brim with great comics.
PVP: I generally enjoy PVP, but Scott Kurtz is a pretty horrible person.

For more, click the Resources tab up top.

Non-Comics Blogs:
Andrew's Blog: Andrew talks about entertaining things.
Andrew's Other Blog: Andrew talks about serious things.
David&Kiko.com: My friends in Japan, with a blog.
Dahlberg Central: Gus Dahlberg and his adorable family.
Booklust: Toronto Illustrator commenting on books and illustration. Interesting stuff.
The Torontoist: The Torontoist is a Toronto-culture blog, covering some of the more interesting goings on in the city (and doing it well). Sort of like a freebie-weekly paper, but it pays less and comes out more.
Blog T.O.: Another great Toronto-centric blog.


Retired:
All Ages: Scott Robins's blog about comics for young readers.
A Bear In The City: Gay-comics linkblog, semi-retired.
GutterNinja: Steve Pheley's awesomely-named blog, full of snark.

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